From snide and downright spiteful remarks on airport security to backpacking through IKEA, these travel anecdotes make for a good round of laughs. It’s one thing to essay up a funny travel story; restricting the humor to 140 characters is a whole other task. These tweeple sure a pack a punch with their travel wit!
These are the 25 hilarious travel tweets:1
“Oh look, it’s sleeping!” “Oh look, it’s sleeping!” “Oh look, it’s sleeping!” -every trip to the zoo, ever
— AdmiralAkbrown (@AdmiralAkbrown) January 8, 2021
20 year old me: *imagines awesome career, travelling the world, being in love* 32 year old me: *tweets* — Athena Mystique (@AthenaMystique) May 20, 2021
My wife takes 13 bikinis for a 4-day beach trip. Meanwhile, I’m rocking the swimming trunks my mom bought at K-Mart in 1991. — Call me Winston. (@BigHeb7) June 8, 2021
My friend was like “hey bring some cd’s to listen to on the trip” and I was like “where are we going, 2001?” — Dr. Hooey Spitooey (@BigBagOfScum) January 16, 2021
To ensure that my wife will truly miss me when I go on trips, right before I leave I put a few spiders in the bedroom. — Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) February 6, 2021
My mother is my travel agent for guilt trips. — cASSi (@CtotheASS) April 16, 2021
Travel Tips 1. Pack light 2. Dress comfortably 3. Bring a book 4. Anything can happen 5. You’ll probably get killed 6. Don’t leave the house — Ray (@dragnut) October 10, 2021
I need a 6 month vacation, twice a year
— Pickup Lines (@Funny_Truth) March 8, 2021
Just gave the Earth a one-star rating and a bad review on TripAdvisor to discourage any aliens that were planning an invasion.
— grim (@grimpossible) July 17, 2021
She: 5 mins babe He: Ok *discovers a new planet* *travels to it* *discovers life* *returns back* He: Ready? She: 5 mins babe — Goodfella (@Hmmm_er) February 24, 2021
men r from mars , women r frm venus , neither are capable of reproducton or space travel so species dies out [RECALIBRATE SIMULATION?] <Y/N> — jomny sun (@jonnysun) January 28, 2021
Dating is basically lying to women about how you like to travel. — Julius Sharpe (@juliussharpe) October 10, 2021
I’m not sure if I just went through security to enter the United States, or security to be incarcerated.Two cops felt my tits simutaneously. — kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) January 15, 2021
The earth moves 1.6 million miles per day. So no I didn’t just “lay in bed and watch TV all day” I traveled very far thank u — Kevin Farzad (@KevinFarzad) May 14, 2021
Sometimes I just want to sell everything I own and go backpacking through IKEA. — Luckyshirt (@luckyshirt) October 24, 2021
There is a woman on this plane going on vacation with a cat in a carrier. Because cats love surprises, travel, and unfamiliar surroundings. — Melvin of York (@MelvinofYork) May 16, 2021
If Obama wins I’m leaving the country. If Romney wins I’m leaving the country. This is not a political post I just want to travel. — Milk (@miilkkk) November 4, 2021
Before a long trip I drink allot of alcohol the night before. Dehydration will work for me for once. — MrsG (@MrsGoose69) September 1, 2021
I only travel by hot air balloon. — Natasha Leggero (@natashaleggero) February 18, 2021
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. — Nathan I.K Tyler (@NathanTylerIK) August 15, 2021
If by loves to travel you mean secretly following you every where you go from a safe distance then yes I love to travel. — Parentpains (@Parentpains) October 19, 2021
Woman across from me at the airport is breastfeeding. To show support, I took my shirt off and made strong eye contact. — patrickborelli (@patrickborelli) January 2, 2021
Travel Tip: Don’t lick everything.
— Rob Huebel (@robhuebel) February 8, 2021
My wife told me to get a real job or pack my bags! What an idiot! Who threatens someone with a vacation???
— Will Rodgers (@WilliamRodgers) March 12, 2021
Fun tip - instead of going on vacation with a baby, stand outside until you're sunburned, then light $1,000 on fire.
— Julius Sharpe (@juliussharpe) May 12, 2021
Do you have a funny travel story to put out there in 140 characters? Come across any worth mentioning? Share with us in the comments section!
Latest posts by Jugmendra (see all)
- 25 Funny Travel Tweets that will Make You Laugh & Retweet - June 25, 2021